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Day 161

Updated: Jun 26, 2019

Every day is grief’s Groundhog Day.

A friend couple shared over dinner their plans for growing their family. They wanted to adopt a baby but the wait, uncertainty of success, and cost had discouraged them.

A year prior, I had several meetings with an adoption consultant who had exceptional success helping parents adopt babies at the time of their birth. She has an adoption mythology that minimizes costs and wait time. I wanted to hire her. Constance’s father vetoed. He didn’t want another child and said, “It would be my deal.” The economics of Constance’s special/medical needs meant that without his participation I couldn’t adopt.

When the friend couple shared their frustration, I told them of the adoption consultant and immediately sent them her info. They met and they hired her.

This week, their child was born. They were there with their birth mother to see her enter the world. It has been a little less than a year since they hired the consultant. They shared their happy news in an email blast filled with photos of the happy family. I sent my congratulations.

We can always choose to react with fear or love. I just keep having to decide to pick love.


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Aug 24, 2018



Unknown member
Aug 23, 2018

Day 162 is at


Unknown member
Aug 22, 2018

Oh girl! That is heartbreaking.

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