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Day 162

Updated: Jun 26, 2019

Constance’s birthday is coming at me like a tidal wave. When she passed, I could imagine living to see her next birthday. Now with it days away, I’m petrified.

Constance received many diverse gifts and experience to celebrate her birthdays in of her short life.

On more than one occasion, Constance handed back a gift to the giver and said, “No thanks.” We tried to explain why this wasn’t polite but, unfortunately, she never got to become old enough to understand that fact.

One gift stands out as having gone over the absolute worst. One year, I had them announce a happy birthday message for her on NPR. I put her in the car, turned the radio to WBEZ at the planned time, and videotaped her as the announcement was being made. In my mind, I imagined Constance giggling with joy when she heard her name.

Instead, she literally put her thumb in her eye. It was as if gouging it out would have been better then listening to it.

Even now, I can’t stop laughing as I watch the video. It was an uproariously bad gift for my shy little seven-year-old.


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Unknown member
Aug 24, 2018

Day 163 is at


Unknown member
Aug 24, 2018

This post is very funny.

Thank you for sharing for loss with the world. It helps me understand how to support others in my life who have lost someone.

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