Today is my first day embarking on any social activities outside the house. With the exception of one work meeting, it is the first time since Constance passed that I am seeing anyone I know outside of my immediate family.
Constance’s former preschool, Cherry Preschool, is having their annual fundraiser for children who need scholarships to attend the school and for providing aides for children in each classroom with special needs. Despite that my daughter had been a few years out of preschool, I was graciously asked to be on the host committee. I was delighted to be bestowed this honor because, this year, we will also celebrate Rhonda’s, their child development and inclusion director’s, retirement.
It is impossible to overstate the transformational role Rhonda played in my daughter, my, and thousands of other families’ lives. She didn’t just teach us how to navigate the scary world of parenting a child with a developmental or physical difference; she taught us how to advocate for our kids. She showed up to meetings with school districts, organized therapists visits, helped us arrange playdates and friendships, strategized how to deal with difficult dads, and provided a shoulder to cry on.
The day of the memorial, I wouldn’t speak to anyone outside of immediate family until Rhonda arrived. I was collapsed in a chair in the front row and couldn’t bring myself to stand. I know I wouldn’t have gotten out of that seat if Rhonda hadn’t come, sat with me to cry, and then helped me stand.
Today honoring Rhonda will propel me into leave the cocooned cave of my house for the first time since Constance’s passing. I could go on and on about how great Rhonda is but, given that I don’t have her permission to write or post any of this, I will just conclude with ‘she’s amazing and we all love her’.
I asked a few friends to join me. One is giving me a ride there and another a ride home. Constance was a child of the village. Now, that community is there for me. In life, you keep thinking you know what you’re made of and then you go from the frying pan to the fire and you really learn.
From https://twitter.com/RachelleJervis and https://www.twitter.com/wantmybabyback:
Reading your blog is the highlight of my morning.
Day 31 is at https://www.wantmybabyback.com/blog/day-31.